Tag Archives: jobs

REPUBLICAN OR DEMOCRAT? BIG BIRD OR ELMO?

5 Oct

 

Republican or Democrat, shit you could even be an alien and there is a good chance you know what Sesame Street is; Ernie, Bert, Oscar the Grouch, Cookie Monster (my favorite), Elmo and the forever infamous Big Bird.

We all practically grew up with Sesame Street and these characters. But why would you want to pick on Big Bird and get rid of him? He is by far the biggest of all the puppets and I imagine could be a really mean drunk if he is drinking. Plus hanging out with Elmo all day would piss me off and make me want to drink! I might even recommend anger management classes just to deal with Elmo all week. Don’t pretend you never wondered why someone hasn’t beaten up Elmo.

Think about Elmo for a moment. He is the new guy on the street (Baltimore crew); he just walked in and is all of a sudden is the center of attention. What has Elmo really accomplished? A few holidays ago he was the hot toy stuffed with plastic and feathers. If you pushed a button he would dance, make some noise, be amusing for a moment then quickly become annoying and never leave your house. HELLLLLL if I wanted that in my life I would date another stripper, stuffed with plastic, annoying, amusing for a few moments and really never leaves your house, PLUS is any stripper really a good “dancer”. I don’t think so. There is not much of a difference between that loser Elmo and a bad pole-dancing stripper.

ImageNow Big Bird is the guy who is going to be the center on the puppet basketball team, the fighter on the puppet hockey team and be the first to stand up for his other fellow puppets. There are no other big puppets on Sesame Street, but what about the Muppets? Kermit, the great Gonzo and Miss Piggy they could use a seven foot yellow bird in their crew. Big Bird would make the Muppets a power house, a potential dynasty and give them street cred (as we say in the hood).

Regardless of whether you liked Mitt’s debate the other night he could be the catalyst that finally brings Kermit a puppet championship. It’s tough being green, as Kermit would say. But finally that conniving weasel Elmo would be on the unemployment line or forced to be on stage dancing to “Pour Some Sugar on Me” by Def Leppard. From what I hear is the most popular stripper song of all time, again from what I hear.

I wouldn’t know…I’m practically a saint!

 

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You think your employer treats you good? 21 reason why we’re the best!

13 Apr

ImageSometimes in the hustle and bustle of day to day life we miss things. Rumor has it that one year my Dad forgot his Anniversary with my Mom. Now I am pretty confident my Dad will deny this with a smile on his face but my point is that we forget about things from time to time. I forgot that this is the 10TH Anniversary of Search Solution Group. That means that we have beat all the statistics out there about new businesses failing.

I tell my teammates all the time that without bad employees and failed business we would struggle. Search Solution Group was started shortly after 9/11 when a ton of businesses were laying people off, but I personally was not left with a lot of options so I gave it a shot. I will forever be thankful to my parents, my friends who let me use their Monster accounts, friends who hired from me and gave me my first placements and a friend who helped me come up with my business name and everything else that comes along with starting a new business. I was not to proud then nor am I today to ask for help and tell people that I just don’t know what to do. Which leads me to the next phase of Search Solution Group……What to do next??

We have started the process of being better. For me at this time it means why you should work with Search Solution Group and be a part of our team. So here goes my list for 2012 that we are offering to our current employees and future employees that make us better than your employer.

 1. Dog friendly environment. Yes we have water bowls and dog hair on the floor. If you leave food on your desk watch out..ha

2. Flex hours, especially when the sun stays out later.

3. Free lunches 5 days a week

4. Improving benefits

5. A soon to be announced awesome 401K plan

6. Free water, energy drinks, flavored water (my favorite), and POP (I am from NY)

7. FREE snacks and candy galore!!!

8. Free car wash

9. Lots of coffee and espresso shots

10. The best commission structure

11. A base salary because we want you to be happy and secure

12. As much vacation time as you need within reason also known as the “Stella Vacation Policy” SVP (just email her and ask stella@ssgresume.com)

13. An annual SSG week long beach vacation. This is fun!!

14. I will also accompany you to 1 emergency room visit per year and make you smile

15. Free parking

16. We have a couch and have NAP TIMES

17. Ice cream cake birthday celebrations

18. Lots of sarcasm

19. Finally NO ONE will yell at you

20. Entrepreneurial cnvironment in which you can be creative and generate as much money as you want.

21. Happy hour fridays which can be drinks, golfing, food or whatever makes you happy

 We are always looking for hard working talent to join our Search Solution Group Family!

Goodbye 2011! In 2012 I Am Going To….

30 Dec

It is almost over for 2011 and I have to admit that it was great year. It is tough to say that 2011 was better than I expected, but it really was. I won’t bore you with all of the details but feel free to email me and I will share with you the highlights.

The popular conversation around the office, newspapers and TV seems to be “what is your New Year’s Resolution“. I really do like this topic because it gets me thinking about what I can do better or differently. Maybe even do less of something and more of something else or a little less of that and a tad more of this. HOWEVER I got to thinking about how awesome I am at everything I do and decided I will make a list of things that I already do so well.   I want to share with others or just tell you what I am going to do in 2012 to be that much more awesome………………………..

1. I am going to continue to write this blog and hope that people figure out when I am being funny

2. Keep getting people fired up because they were personally offended by what I wrote

3. I am going to let one friend of mine start beating me at golf because it is that pathetic at this point.

4. I am going to keep working harder than the competition to make our business bigger and better.

5. I am going to separate business from personal and realize that they are not the same.

7. I am going to accept people for who they are and let them know that is why I like them.

8. I am not going to sky dive, I am to important to the civilized world.

9. I am going to enjoy life more – and maybe even take a whole week off of work for the first time in 10 years

10. I am going to enjoy having one of my best friends and his family in Charlotte

11. I am going to teach my team how to recruit, source and make intelligent placements

12. I am going to realize that people are looking to me for answers and give them

13. I am going to dance with the devil in the pale moon light

14. I am going to marry the 2nd girl that asks me (timing is everything)

17. I am going to draft Wes Walker next year

18. I am going to try and stop making fun of realtors

19. I am going to branch out

20. I am going to use the term “knuckleheads” more

21. I am going to eat more beef jerky instead of throwing it at Stella

22. I am going to laugh more

23. I am going to start telling people I am bi-polar because it is gaining more popularity

24. I am going to try and wipe that smug look of my face

25.  I am going to see emotional unavailability in others as a formidable challenge for go getter types like me

26. I am going to pretend I am not bored by you

So what are you going to do in 2012?  Feel free to add your own.

Happy New Year and thanks for reading and participating.